Monday, October 30, 2006

Sharing smthg....
maser tu kan, aku nk gi mandi, den aku terdgr radio...pgi2 arh...

radio: kadangkala biler kiter renung dosa kiter begitu besar sekali..amat berat rasanya..
me(dlm ati) : haiz...talk abt it...
radio: berape besar dosa kiter ni?
me : tell me the biggest thing u know, times by the biggest number u r aware of..
radio: adakan ia sebesar bahtera Nabi Nuh? tidak? lebih besar lagi?!!
me: dats too small lah babe..
radio:adakan ia seperti pasir2 yg bertaburan di pantai?
me:it like the whole univerise covered by the pasir dat cuts into 1 million pieces lah..
radio:adakah ia sebesar dunia dan segala apa yg dlm isi nya?
me: bigger..much..much..bigger...
radio: adakah ia lebih besar dari angkasa lepas dan segala apa yg dlm nya??!
me: waddya think...?
radio: tetapi, apakah ia lebih besar dari magfirah dan keampunan Allah S.W.T?
radio: adakah ia lebih luas, lebih dalam dari rahmat Nya??
me: never...my minor problems, will never be too big, infact, can nvr be matched to His forgiveness....

so my frens....i hope, juz like how the thing inspired me, i hope it enlightens u too...remember, if God has a comp, he'll send u e-mail every hour, wishing u a gud day....
I love Allah...my God...
"Allah..dere's only one God n Muhammad is His messanger..Allah...lahilllahaillah...."
*peace*


she told the story ... 10:36 AM


Sunday, October 29, 2006

quick update only...
really looking forward to go jln raya wif frens....
bought a le coq sportif bag....now, i really feel like a sch girl...
cut my hair...totally love it...coz its damn short...miss my hair short..
n, i've cancel the idea of me going to NTU...haiz...if i were the first child, maybe..its possible..
but, if i keep on schling...dat means my parents hv to keep on working. dun think my mom cud work for another 3 years after i graduate...she be too tired...n papa...will still hv to work to pay of house bill...when the cpf money has all gone...den, me n abg gotta work to help pay the house n to keep food on the table...n when abg got married, i will hv to be the sole bread winner..rite? dat means..no time to get married...yah...juz nice...work my ass off...till i can afford a condo...den, maybe, everything will be at ease...at least, even abit...haiz...so, juz a dip will do...maybe not even gud enuf to repair airplane or be the person to sign off...but....i gez, i juz hv to work mysef to the top...rite?? ok~~ dats all...gud nites...


she told the story ... 9:02 PM


Thursday, October 26, 2006

I am totally hungry rite now....haiz...so fat, yet so hungry...
Juz now was the first of my touch rugby. Ppl were nice but dis time, its harder to get to noe dem coz moz of dem r oredi frm the same cls. haiz...very sian. like during intro time, its like "im ...frm quality management." den the next one, same. next one, oso same...haiz...my team is like divided to 4 grps. the qme's, the real estate n the M.E. some frm PDI. Me, the only AT...haiz, dey dun even noe wat is AT lah..hahah...den, it was like the first time i was treated "normally". haiz...but it made me feel like im living two live. the touch rugby ppl wont recognise me on normal days, n on IS module day, my classmate wont recognise me...haiz..seronok ker?? so, after touch rugby, i go chnge n its time for CATS!! i was totally lookin forward to it. actually, i was totally looking forward to "HIM". hahahaha!!! dat guy is SUPER GORGEOUS!!!!! haiz...in cats, i was very very loud...hahaha...wanna attract his attention wat...i dun care if he thinks dat im very noisy or wat, even if i did attract his attention, even if it was in the wrong way, he still acknowledge my existance wat!!! hahaha...hes juz so cute arh....when he laf...i tell u, i juz melt lah....he's tall, super white wif red skin....so ensem...i wonder if the rez of the girls think abt him the same way....i wanna tell somone frm the same cls dat i hv a crush on him. but i was kinda afraid dat dey mite take it seriously n do smthg totally idiotic....it juz a fun crush of a super ensem man lah...pls lah...like as if he even notice me...duh??? he got the kinda bad boy luk but hes very soft spoken...so my type sia....so cute some more!! i can nvr over going gaga over him!!! hahaha...i dun want dis module to end...oh my love!!! HAHAHAHAHA.....drama abit arh...~~~~ btw, next tues, the malay guys ask me if wanna go jln raya...hmm..wah...den can get to noe dem eh...not bad idea arh...but, NONE OF DEM R GOOD LUKING!!! hahaha..such a waste sia... wait, did i sound like a bitch?? errghhh...ok, ok enuf of cute guys...go do hmwk now kay??? first, find food...stomach makin rock concert inside....

i wonder wats his name...


she told the story ... 4:27 PM


Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Salam Lebaran
Selamat Hari Raya!!
Its finally here!!! Whipppeeeee.....!!! a few snopps on yesterday...
Class was orite...maths was damn funny...stoopid lect kept on makin stoopid mistakes... imagine, he wrote 8..den suddenly, a few steps he wrote 6. Me, was totally frustrated by his mistakes b4, shouted..."WEH SIR?! HOW CAN 8 BECOME 6??!!" den, he luk mad...his xpression.."student very rude". den he turned to the board, den turned to his sudents n his expression,"heheh..i made i mistake..my student pay attention..hehehe..yeah...*peace*" WTH??!! gosh...noe wat lina asked him? "sir, ur license buy one arh??" kiwak....God!! hahaha...actually yesterday, i was kinda feeling dwn arh...like i kept imagine if arnd me were to be siots or juz sec 5...we wld moz probly ponn mahts n go geylang or wateva...haiz...i wished...n i kept singing raya songs lah...juz to pujuk my heart. Den, since we hv 3 hours break b4 maths, jia ling ask if me n lina wanna acompany her to go bugis chnge bag. we agreed since we had nothing better to do. at clementi mrt, gez who i met?? AMEERA!!! was totallly xcited!!! i was like...AMEERA!!! den i hugged her!!!! WAAHHHH!!! I was bloody hepi!!!! like suddenly, raya got meaning like dat...she was on the way to geylang...waiting for someone...hahaha...den lina comented.."its like the first smile n laughter for u today.." she asked if i was close to her...den i said..erm..not really lah but i gez the whole class is very close...haiz..its hard to xplain to dem how its like if u spent moz of ur life wif the same person...its like family...den...afterdat...another xciment of the day..I MET MAHERA!! hahaha...on raya eve...dis one is planned...we buka together..!!! fuyohh!! ate korean food!! thank you Mahera!!! she blanja me....hahaha...on my laz day of puasa dis yer, i buka wif my family. Mahera. wah...n she was so xcited for me for the touch rugby. i was actually quite nervous...but seeing her so xcited for me makes me wanna consider it as a cca!!! really!!!! yeah...fight for the jersey rite??? i'll do my best....
today...or shud i say now, mama not at home...go pray hari raya..papa too but diff mosque..
--dun ask y..~~~ abg slping...hes like totally sick...vomitting n stuffs...i donno if he hv to go fall out...coz he shud be doing stand by today...haiz...donno leh...wat am i doin at home?? coz i woke up late for raya prayers..kwang kwang kwang....
Ok!! going to eat ketupat wif rendang, den second round, lontong wif lemak n smbal sotong!!! SUPER SHIOK!!! hepi raya!!
Ouh, luper...i oso wanna take dis opportunity to ask for ur forgiveness...incase i post or posted anything u dun like....sorry yeah....no hard feelings kay??!!
Allahu akbar Allahu akbar Allahu akbar...laillaha illallahu wallahu akbar. Allahu akhbar walilla ilahamd...(biler lagi bloeh post takbir? btol tak? hehehe)
11 Nov, rasakan gegaran!!!!


she told the story ... 8:38 AM


Monday, October 23, 2006

dun say his name in my face. i juz cant handle it.
haiz...today's the laz final day of sahur n puaser. yesterday was the final day of terawih. Alhamdulillah, i didnt miz it...if not, i dun think i'll celeb hari raya wif an open heart.
Yesterday was oso, wat seem like a thousand days, i at last, got to see mahera. yeah, m partner in crime. like if i was thinkin of robbing a bank, who wud u kol? i wld kol her...hahaha...yeah... meeting her feels like old times...haiz..miss doz days...still remember how we used to goof arnd doin stoopid stuffs...den, reminds me of siots..lagi haiz...those late nights at mac...things will nvr be the same again. well..wat can i say...i'd lived my teen life fully now its time to be an adult... ergh..maybe not...hahaha...yeah...like if i become a mom, i will hv great things to tell my kids.. abt siots...abt sec 5 itqan...abt fazzy wif the "gula" thingy...abt the scandal wif mardy...abt Tan... abt my exs...HAHAHAH....yeah...thank you ppl...for giving me such memorable experiences... haiz....n to mahera..."eh, nonsense, pls stop saying nonsense lah!!! its becoming nonosense..." ~~inside joke~~~
klah...da azan...n got sch...i still hvnt do my tutorial!!! arghhh!!! i dun care.....


she told the story ... 5:38 AM


Saturday, October 21, 2006

Deepavali valtuka!! (correct tk spelling)
haiz...kenaper eh dis yer tkder mood raya?
Kalo laz yer...fuyoh!! mcm tk saba2 gitukan nk raya..despite o's n stuff..tpi mcm ader smangat arh!! buat kuih...beli baju...den..kemas rumah..
dis year...walau pon aku pergi geylang berkali2...more den normal...tpi smangat tkde babe...
aper sbb2 nyer? mari kiter renungi :~~
1- Kalo sch dulu...fuyoh!! semua xcited...nnti discuss nk pkai baju aper tudong aper kasut aper..den citer arh dulu2 raya ker...share recipe kuih...share kuih...dok, stori2...nnit blang lah psl smlm gi geylang ker...haper ker...tpi..dis year...haiz...saper nk citer psl raya...semua cina2 tu tk tahu pon raya...yg bdk2 mlayu tu...haiz...dorg lelaki kan...jadi mcm tk kuasa ngn raya gitu...haiz.. tkder xcitement frm frens... :'(
2-Dulu, da akhir2 ramadhan nie...biasa amalan ni ditingatkan kan..tpi dis year, akhir2 ramadhan plak aku kena ehem...mak kau...baru engine nak stat da stop...jdi kehebatan ramadhan aku tk dapt rasa...mcm mana nk rase raya babe...tk dpt arh...haiz...sedih sak..
3- Abg kena stand by...saper nk geng ngn aku? saper nk make a neutral stand biler papa ngn mama gadoh on raya? abeh, aku nk minta maaf sorg2? lame nye...boring nyer jdi anak sorg... aku jeles ngn yg ramai adik bradik...bkh gadoh2...rebut2...share2 makan kuih...haiz...
4- Nie...erm...entalah maybe ade sedikit sebyk effected arh...tpi...not the main part arh...
5- byk homework + tutorial + wateva lah. maths online lah, self test lah, quiz lah...dorg bodoh kehape? AKU NK RAYA LAH PANTS!!!
entalah eh...aku harap ader insan yg blh buat aku xcited cket atleast...yeah fiza!! Raya!! whoohoo!! cumon!! xcited arh cket!! woohhhhooo!!!..~~~errhh...not working...~~~~
btw, aku buat kuih raya confleks...kalo korg nk dtg, boleh rasa..hehehe...time aku buat, aku teringt mahera, kau ingat tk yg kiterorg gi buka uma kau? abeh kau buat kuih raya confleks? abeh dier nyer syrup terlebih? hahaha!!! aku masej ingt, sbb aku kutok kau rabak!! hahaha!! sori eh...camat ari raya..maaf zahir dan batin..dan kuih confleks!! hahaha!!!
ok..da...tu jer...pada yg celeb deepavali jgk, hepi deepavali!!!


she told the story ... 12:58 PM


Friday, October 20, 2006

suprise..suprise..
i didnt turn up today's iftar...hahaha...
why? im juz too tired arh...imagine, i've been out since fri!! all the way i didnt buka at home. so i tot..maybe, it wld be better if i stay home lah...n i am juz very tired..today, after sch, i went to bugis wif Jia Ling n Lina. i actually forgotten the iftar thingy n made a promise wif Lina to go bugis wif her to help her buy helmet. i actually like see if she remember or not arh. if she doesnt, den i dun wanna tell her, but den, Jia Ling reminded her. n de xciment on her face, like 2 year old kid, u juz cant say no to. so, i followed her. at bugis, we "tour" the whole area, coz she wasnt sure of the location. den...after dat, i go home...havent eaten a single thing despite able to. haiz..sian leh...de tot of going to iftar juz makes me even more lethargic...nvr mind lah...im gonna c u ppl on raya rite? InsyaAllah...i gez...
today sch was kinda funny..stoopid kok leong lah...i "melatah" infront of him, "eh mak kau"...n u noe wat he said? "eh Fiza, y u scld me? u scld me "p*k* mak kau rite?" i was like..HUH?? wth?? wat nonsense sia...den he dragged it the whole day lah..n the others oso like "nasi tambah"~~hahah~~
TODAY, i admit...i have a new crush!! weeeee!!! hahahaha!!! actually, i like dis bike...its a scooter looking bike, red in colour...it was LOVE at first sight lah...den, eventually...i become more n more attracted to it...coz, every time i finish lect, i will oways see it, coz its parked at blk 51..n my lect n tutorial are all at blk 50..!! den, one time, i saw the owner coming frm the bike...!! (actually, i tot the owner muz be a girl) OMG!! hes not bad lookin..but hes very dark...but gotta cool type, macho man man one... wahlan leh.....so cho one!! den juz now...i saw him givin a ride to one girl...i donno if its his girl or not lah...but i dun think so...or at least, i dont want it to be so..LOL!! I AM SO FREAKING JELES!!!
~~~haiz...so..only the first week of sch n i have tutorials for all subj n still hv to do online quiz n additional work...f man...haiz...gez, not much raya for me....
n, deres smthg bothering me now arh...donno how to put it....wat can i do to make it rite eh? i wish, i can stop comparing arh...and stat acepting...but, its very the hard...how to?? like...i tell u all ur life u are a girl n suddenly i tell u, u are sctually a guy...how will u face it? how can smthg so simple do smthg so drastic on ur life??? GOSH!! its MY life...dalah..malas to talk abt it....bye!


she told the story ... 5:57 PM


Tuesday, October 17, 2006

The second day of second semester.
Was alrite i gez...it stats wif mr. ong pekak. he is...if we get too noisy, he juz wont be able to hear it...funny sia...imagine, if suddenly the class was being noisy, den suddenly total silent...weird rite? but anyways, dis has cum to an advantage to moz of dem, so dey can speak even louder...haiz...den, we had maths. i really really hate my new maths lect. hes like super blur sotong basi type...really...i mean, like...gosh..he donno how to teach one lah...he juz scribbles on the board, den he say, "yah, like dis.." like wat the hell???? nonsense. n he kept on scolding me n jia ling for not bringing our lappy, coz he said he told us yesterday to bring it. (NOT!!). well, WATEVA. i juz went to dream land for the whole 1 hr. n the next hr, he wasted it, trying to solve a qsn. gosh, hes a lect man, n he took so long to solve a haf part qsn..stooopid....wat i hate moz abt him is dat, the way he luk at ppl is very negetive. like he juz "cap" u as lazy type, or never do hmwrk type, or juz plain tk kuasa type. u can tell the diff. den, it was Mechanics. THE ONLY thing dat was actually gud seh...i mean, i really L-O-V-E mechanics arh!! its like physics wif force n lots of angles in between, it is soo my thing. i totally dig it!!! PLUS the lect IS SUPER CUTE!!! if hady was 20 years older, n thinner, he wld luk like him!! yah!! i love my lect!!! at last...a decent one... thank God....and the best thing abt him is dat, we were hving lect at 12-1, den break 1-2 den his tutorial at 3-4. BUT, due to his ULTIMATE kindness, he said dat we dont nd to go for tutorial later...dat cud only mean one thing, HOME!!! LOL!!! n it was only 1240pm.. wow...i love my day today...
dats all~~going to dream land now~~~


she told the story ... 2:19 PM



Dear Heart,
I know you have been broken, shattered n scar
I know your dreams are now shreaded apart
and still it hurts like it was yesterday

the tot of him still beats u
the mention of his name still awaken u
u still feel the vibe
u still remember the smile
he was neither forgotten nor left ur side

but heart, he's no longer here
he is not coming back to heal u
he will never come bck
n i noe it hurts u
but u gotta be strong

coz deres more to life den him
deres still dreams for u to acheive
for your frens
your family
your companions are still waiting
for u to get get on the ride, yet once again

so brace ursef
be stonger
oh,make it on a double
n nvr luk bck
coz memories arent strong enuf to heal u
but if u take my hand,
i mite juz can
for this rollercoster ride
not for the one
with a broken heart.

Of all my closest frens, the ones dat i trust moz, my dear fren zahra..is the only person who doesnt know abt my blog. she saw nabil yesterday, n she smsed me, arnd 11:26 am. did i wish she didnt? no. did i wished she did? no. i wished she cud see tru my charade, pretending like my heart wasnt even interested in the idea. but, bcoz she didnt, i juz had to hold it bck, put my chin up high...n went tru the day, shopping wif her n natto like it wasnt even on a micro-unicell of my braincell. thank you zahra for beliving dat i am strong.
p/s:
{i still wanna noe where he alights, wat hes wearing, does he luk alrite, does he notice her, frm where u broad, which cabin was he in..., the important thing, hes doing juz fine w/o me ;) }
it is killing me...gently


she told the story ... 12:32 AM


Saturday, October 14, 2006

bored, do survey:
single,taken or crushing?
single in reality, taken by Hady, crushing on cute + hot guys!!
when you meet the right person,do you fall in love with him/her fast?
i gez so...? like, when u doing mcq, u noe the right ans, u tick it rite away right? why hv doubts when it is right? ~~stoopid qsn~~
have you ever had your heart broken?
has anyone not?
do you believe that there are some circumstances where cheating love is acceptable?
donno..i dun think so lah....if u cheat to love, den its not loving wat, its call cheating...aperjer....
have you ever talked about marriage with another before?
yup...my mom, my dad, my frens, my bro, my aunties....HAHAHAH...
if someone likes you right now,what do you think is the best way to let you know his/her feelings?
tell me...duh? if i like u, i will tell u too, but if i dun, den u can kiss ur arse gudbye!!!
do you enjoy getting into relationship?
huh? yes lah...if u dun enjoy den y get into it??
be honest,what is the furtherest thing you and your ex did?
Loved. (not make love eh...im still a virgin!!!!)
do you believe in love at first sight?
i belive in bcoming interested at the first sight.
are you romantic?
not to the one i hate
do you believe you can change someone?
NO! i cant even convince someone to buy smthg...how to even chnge...?
if you could get married somewhere,where would it be?
in my dream. so, it will be perfect n cost free...n when i woke up, WALAH...married...HAHAHA!!
do you give in easily when you are fighting?
i give in after 5 secs, 5 days, 5 weeks, or 5 months...it depends...
do you have feelings for someone right now?
no
have you ever wish that you could have someone but u messed it up?
No.
have you ever broken a heart?
plenty
if one day your best friend falls in love with the person you are deeply in love with,what will you do?
if its bestfren, i will be excited for her!!! coz, if shes likes him n he likes her bck, n i noe dat guy is a great guy, i will be absolute hpi for her!!!
if its some beecchhheeess, i will slay her. LOL!!
are you missing someone now?
HELL YEAH!!!! my sec 5 itqans...I WANT A RENUNION!!!!!
Now,you have to ask 5 of your friends to do this survey in their blogs.write down their names in the list below:
interested n bored? do it den!!!


she told the story ... 12:22 PM


Wednesday, October 11, 2006

"Wad hppns wen another appear? wad happns wen ure begining 2 feel tired of waiting? Wad will hppn 2 e one whom u tot was e one? Maybe he was not the one for u afterall. Maybe its u who r x loyal. Jodoh di tgn tuhan. Belive in fate! Stay strong"~Mahera~
Today, was yet my longest day eva...wif only 2 hours of sleep, no sahur, i stat my day teaching. it was herroundeous...i was soo bloody fed up wif alot of classes, scolded A LOT of student.... i was black. evil n errgghh!! i donno wat to say, dat girl, wasnt me. den, it was gals nite out wif my usual gerl frens....my mood was all over the place...i was feeling drained arh..the only thing dat actually keeps me going was mardy...i was juz holding to her all the time...den, i was kinda not on the rite mind when i met wif Azlina's fren's fren. lets name him aff. aff sells drinks...actually, i didnt even notie him, i was luking, gazing, adimiring the drinks....untill...i noticed a tatto on his wrist....hahaha!! a link...remember??? ok~~so, i luked at him, dimple, yet, another link......when azlina, n de rest was talkkin abt him how he " mengeletar" or watsoeva, i wasnt really paying attention n my mind was drifted to..."smwhere else"...i bcome, emotional...n i kinda like...i donno how u describe it arh...like, bck to square one i gez....i did hear wat mardy said,"i mean, dis is geylang seh, its like impossible for u not to meet anyone u know" at dat moment, i said to mysef, "mardy, i can name u one person dat i confirm wont see, not bcoz i noe where he is, but bcoz, i wll nvr see him again"~~hell yeah i met alot of ppl!!! to name some, amri's gang, firdaus yusof, dis guy i nvr see for a few years, arrif, Mr. Fadlhur, dis actor frm selagi ada kasih...GOD!!!
after we ate whole heartedly, we went for prayer n went bck to aff stall's again...i was juz lukin at his tatto...juz wanna get a glimpse of his dimple smile, i wasnt developing a crush on him, but in him, i saw..."him"...the feeling, of comfort, dat i yearned for all this while was, right infront of me...den, i noticed his right arm, he covered it wif sm sort of bandage...another link....den, at dis time of point...i was juz abt to hug him...yes, i said hug...i was reminded of all the things dat hppnd....den, after we bought the drinks, we left, truth, i didnt wanna go...i wanna luk at him...foreva...den, as we walked away... azlina wanted to buy chae kuay wif sotong, so we patah balik, den, i yet see another guy wif a bandaged arm, covering his tattoo...i was abt to cry, i was trying to catch dat person eye n smile at him...but, i didnt, i juz luked away, i feel so bloody stooopid!! like a total idiot...every thing i see, i'll think of him...it was juz making me nuts.the worst part of it all, is thinking of the moments we spent, n how he ended it so easily... i was abt to xplode...i didnt even notice wat we were talking or walking...i was directionless....i was juz holding to mardy.....den, at dat moment....mahera smsed me wif the msg aboved.....i was abt to cry, i held bck my tears, den, mardy saw it...i hv no xplantaion to her...so i juz brushed her off... turned, she, undersatndingly, leave me alone for me to gather my strenght bck n smile again... Afterwards, like an award winning actress, i acted...like i am ok....~~~~
For, mahera to go to the trouble, msgin me wif smthg strong n yet totful, wif much sensitivity n care. wif much encoragement n love, even she is ava so busy...even she oways hv dis srtong stand n normally juz knocks my head to get it bck to sense, for her to do smthg like dat, it had brought tears to my eyes...* n, it still does*
For mardy, understanding my need, no qsn asked, holding me still...helping me wif no doubts, held my hand all tru the way.....make the tears fall...*it still does*
thank you...even i hv not much to say, i think, the words fits perfectly...i wish, everyone in dis world hv frens like dem....both of u, r perfect to me...
my frens...i will not make u worry...no more...FIZA FIGHTING!!!!!
i love you
always...
*sobs...sobs..*


she told the story ... 11:43 PM


Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Lets all begin wif a sigh...haiz...y? tomorro im doing tchin again...yup.. AGAIN!! belive it or not arh...haiz....
Why? kesian...dats is my only n best explanation i can give...i fell so guilty, coz i promised her tomorro we gonna SHOP!! but, i turned her dwn...i feel so bad, i hope she wont hold it against me...Fazzy baby...sorryy!!!
wat hppnd today, is smthg not worth to talked abt....i wanna go out wif my gerl frens...Siots i mean...or mardy...or fazzy....Natt!!! its been euons since we had a girls talk....haiz...im missing everyone again...dalah fiza..dah...
suddenly, i found mysef thinking abt wat Jay said,"kalo kau, aku phm, kau mmg slalu solo, nafsi nafsi, i can survive on my own nyer type.." i juz wanna make dis clear, i really dun think i can eva survive on my own. honestly. but, y i oways do things mysef is, bcoz,i dun wanna trouble other ppl, or like say i need to go return book at libry, i dun need the whole grp to come wif me rite? i mean, y shld i bother sm1 else when its me who needs to go to the libry?~~haiz...i juz hope ppl get wat i mean...its hard to xplain...so, if u were to come to me n say, fiza, i want to help!! i wld be the world happiest person!! but, if u dun, i wont ask for it, coz, it mite juz trouble u, or make u feel burden, i wld nvr wanna do dat to my frens...atleast...i tried my best not to..haiz...fiza...u r smthg wrong.....
tomorro is Geylang..i need to buy a baju, else, no raya dis year...im kinda bored to celeb raya, it kinda bcome a routine...but,thinking abt shopping...dat juz excites me...especilly wif frens...
Natt...kau maseh ingt? "Aku nak abg ah.." hahah....
smthg is wrong wif me arh...seriously, i donno wat..juz not in my elements i gez...i think i've spent too much time at home, watching useless drama/anime....GAME OVER!!
p/s: tomorro, if i see Aiman, im gonna smile at him
p/s: thank you mera for making effort to understand
p/s: thank you for reading my blog n understanding my nonsense
p/s: i wanna go shopping


she told the story ... 11:44 PM


Sunday, October 08, 2006

Ok, i juz figure this out....how do you a thesis? its very... donno wat to say...its hard to talk abt one thing, n den move on to antoher topic...i mean...how do u say dis, like argghh..i donno how to say it...if its mahts rite, dere re steps to it, like first, u find the wat, den wat den wat, den u apply the fomula den u get the ans. But if its words, like continuing n linking frm one chap to another chap is juz clueless....haiz...no wonder my report on Amp sucks...hahaha...what is this abt? well, im helpin a fren doing a thesis on Solat. y i agreed to help coz, its for a gud cost, i mean, when was the last time i opened up my irk book? a better qsn, when wa the last time i opened my FIQH book...haiz...bad me...since, i have the knowledge, n time, n it is THE HOLY month, so, why not rite?? haiz..it can oso improve my report writing skill...i think, i need to go to ame course or smthg for this, imagine if i hv to write a report on y the plane broke dwn? wat the hell am i gonna do??~~a brilliant idea, HIRE smone else for dat..LOL..~~
now, i donno how to write it, like, first wat, den who, den y...eh? maybe i can follow dis steps.. but den again, syarat where to put? den solat2 sunnah? den solat jumaat? den....i am bck to square one...haiz...i did not make a wrong choice in choosing areospace as a career...Thank God..
p/s: Irsayd has pay me...COME ppl!!! lets go SHOPPING!!!!!


she told the story ... 9:15 PM


Saturday, October 07, 2006

Confession : how can i not think of him when i saw men with tattoo on dem? its like hearing a lame joke n u'll think of nat. Or, luking at tetsu, n think abt Hazzy. it is juz a link.
Environment : The haze is freaky horible bad. It has gotten my x sick!! Damn you haze!!! SHHOOO!!! out frm spore!!!!
Now, the story:~~~
I remembered when i was 15, malay novels were so popular....den, Fatimah asked me "kalo kau da putus sgn org yg kau cinta, n kau dah ada org lain, abeh mataair lamer kau dtg balik, maner satu kau pilih?" without hesitation, or much tot, i said,"ofcoz arh aku dgn mataair baru aku, yg lamer tu lamer kes arh. aku tk patah balik" but she said " kau tk phm, imagine ni org kau da syg lamer tau..kau imagine, Fazli, kalo tiber2, dier ckp dier suka kau...kau buat aper?"....laz time i was in the fazli craze, den, i gave it a thought...but, i said to her...i will still go wif my new guy... den like fatimah, sadidah, n i donno who else lah, kinda gang up n asked me y...i dun remember the reason...but dey said, "biler kau da kena baru kau tahu.." LOL!!! without realising much...i did wat i said, i choose the new guy...the only reason i remembered giving dem is," kalo aku maseh suker laki tu, aku wont go out wif another guy aper..." hahaha...well, i gez, dats juz who i am...haiz...~~~y the sudden reminicsing was bcoz,on my way to bugis was a long journey, n this tot juz creep in to my head...~~~
what hppnd today? iftar wif fazzy, natto, mur, shyuhada, wajihah n bellas...Mar was sick, mera senggugut n the rest juz got "better things" to do...BUT, those who turned up, im really hepi!!!
though, i donno for sm reason, i kinda felt abit lethargic...(im gettin old..) AND!!! arrggghhh!!! im really frustrated!!!!! coz, i saw this shoes dat i really really wanna buy!!! and all long, i've been trying on my right leg, n suddenly, the only shoe dat on the left, n my ankle "cracked" again... errgghhh.... juz when i tot i cud stat wearing heels!!!!!!!!!!!!! f seh....im so sad.... :'((((.....
now, it kinda make me worry...how am i gonna handle my sport n wellness???? haiz... maybe, i shld go for physio....haiz...maybe...if tell mera, she gonna hit my head...again...LOL!!! eayh...come to think of it, mera reminds me of korean woman!!! like i said, it is juz a link
p/s: HAPPY BIRTHDAY LINA U SLUTTO!!!!


she told the story ... 12:18 AM


Thursday, October 05, 2006

so many things troubling me rite now...haiz...
i wonder how my frens hanlde problems...i wacthed my lovely sam soon...it touched on how ppl handle a broken heart, some ppl bake, some take a walk, some joined the marathon...for me, i belong in the ignoring the problem ppl...i can be so bloody fed up with smthg one day, the very next day, juz pretend it didnt hppnd....for this thing dat's been bothering me, haiz...i really really hv no coment..well, still remember wat dida said, "mcm roda, it juz spins bck to u"....prob wif me is, i dun wanna talk abt it, i dun wanna solve it, ignoring it is always be the best, coz, to me dere aint no solution to it...erm, if ya thinkin its abt..errr...no, its not abt it...i've given up wif my love life...hahah..seriously...arrhhh...LUperkan jelah....
tomorro, iftar wif sec 5 itqans...insyaAllah...i wanted to list all of the former itqanians, n state the date i last see dem...but...it has juz been foreva...seriously...n i kinda think dat its impossible to gather all of us together again...haiz...gez, dats wat growin up is abt yah? to leave the past behind...hmm..maybe, i shld start growing up too...well, maybe once sch starts...
haiz...sch...another seriously bothering factor...i really am gonna die dis new sem...Allah, help me...makes me reconsider in taking canoe polo...maybe, i shld juz stick wif badminton, its no stress, its easy to skip, n its smthg i am very familliar wif....
hmmm...antoher code frm my lovely sam soon "once, the body asked the heart, when i got hurt, i get medicine to heal, how abt u? how do u heal?"~~~wateva~~
p/s: issit possible to return after 3 years??? i dun think so...hmmm...food for thought...
~~ok, fiza smthg wrong...suddenly sound so blue~~~~
SEE YOU CRAZY PPL TOMORRO!!!! MAHERA U OWE ME SMTHG!!!! SIKIN I MISS YOU!!! FAZZY U KUDUT!!! AMEERA?!!! WHERE ARE YOU!!! WAK JOJO!!!! DUN GV PROMOS AS A REASON!!! ALL OF YOU BETTER SHOW YR ASS UP!!!!! plz, dun take dis seriously...
ciows, 530, bugis...WE GONNA BRING THE HOUSE DWN!!!!


she told the story ... 11:45 PM


Wednesday, October 04, 2006

3 names you go by
1. Fiza
2. fez
3. fiz

3 physical things you like abt urself
1. my fat tummy..(not)
2. smile
3.fingers..(its show u how much u've worked to get all the wrinkles..)

3 physical things you dislike abt urself
1. thighs...
2.cheecks
3. hair

3 parts of my heritage..(huh?)
1. bugis
2. indian
3. arab

3 things you cant stand
1. Super bad odour
2. broken promises
3. Lies

3 things that scare you
1.waking up with no memory
2.waking up with no kidney (LOL!!)
3.Al-Nar

3 of your favourite shows
1. Prison break..its very cool!!
2. Sapuri
3. use to be S.I, 2..HAHAHAHADDDYYYDYDYDYY

3 of your favourite anime
1. Ouran high
2. Inuyasha
3. fruit basket

3 of ur current favourite songs (songs on repeat)
1. Glide
2. through the fire (hady's version)
3. you give me wings

3 movies you can watch over and over
1. Memoris of a geisha
2. Howl's moving caslte
3. all of harry potter's

3 movies you would like to watch
1. Stay alive
2. Ghost game
3. aviator

3 things you are wearing right now
1. errm..
2. errghh..
3. butterfly night dress..LOL!!!

3 things you want in a relationship..(can i say i dont want a relationship?)
1. no drama
2. real
3. honesty

3 physical things of the opposite gender that attract you (refering to HADY)
1. how he smile
2. HiGH cheeck bones
3. a worried face..(luk so cute!!!)

3 Bad Habits
1. whining
2. thinking too much
3. Laziness (is dat a habit??)

3 of ur favourite hobbies
1. hang out wif my gal frens
2. Blog hopping
3. create new words of wisdom...(HAHAHA)

3 things you wanna do badly right now
1. Clean my mess
2. Bake
3. meet some1

3 careers you are currently considering
1. Cuci kapal terbang
2. Repair kapal terbang
3. Creative designer..inspired by sapuri...hahaha (if its 4, i wanna be a bike race too!!!)

3 kids name you like(aper punyer soalan nie???!!)
1. Nur Alaina
2. Imam Hady bin Hady Mirza..(LOL)
3.Ana majunun...(i really hv no idea???)

3 places you wanna go on vacation
1. Europe
2. Bali
3. JAPAN, hokkaido to be specific...

3 things you wanna do before you die
1.Cuci kapal terbang.
2.Kemas bilik...nnti kene marah ngn mak
3.Be in front cover of the most successful women..(LOL)

3 ways that you are stereotypically
1. Step, controling freak
2. Thinks she can survive on her own
3. unfrenly

3 crushes.
1. HADY MIRZA
2. RIDWAN(dis 7 year old kid frm pri1 ihsan)
3. ~~~dats it?~~~~

3 ppl u wanna tag
1. annonymous(from my tag board, LOL)
2. NATTO
3. kryis


she told the story ... 12:40 PM



two things bothering me now, but, i dun care....u noe, it is always wrong either u do it, or u dun do it...haiz....i wld rather do it so i wont live wif regret...but i noe, sm mite disaggree n say dat, u'll regret more if u do it...but, wateva..its not i repeat NOT a life n death situation. And yesterday, was n awesome awesome day!!!
Iftar with Mardy, Natto, Rui, Ice & Mary!!!! hahaha..i think, i spent the most!!!
arnd, 630, we met up at orchard mrt...plan is to ifar at ramen ten. met up wif ice, den mardy n nat...~inside joke: "EEE, purple"(nat, u said E, not A. LOL!!)~~ den went to ramen ten n met up wif de rest, it was oso ice bepday so we kinda like celeb it..though its not much...at ramen ten, OMG!! u gotta be kinding me...we ordered our food, arnd 655, n mine n mardy was the last to arrived!! ARRGGHH!!! i mean, seriously, mine is a dry ramen, n i didnt say it while im eating, but the chicken, was cold...the food only arrived at 730 or 740....God!!! me n mardy was abt to juz gave up n go for swensen instead...den, walah...it came..haizz....after ramen ten, we headed for al-falah, den we go to SWENSEN!!! fuyohhh!!! i donno abt the rest, but i think all of us was having an awesome time!!! but, natto was kinda sick, coz shes having cramps...so, at swensen, she juz kinda mellowed abit...kesian my Natto....ouh, btw, at al-falah, we were joined by Azons..the nyonya...n man, i tell u, she really has bcome one!!! LOL!!! n in the midst of the laughter at swensen, rui had to go...her parents da bising...so, yah...arnd 1050, we headed home..haiz...wat a fun fun day!!!
on 9th, deres gonna be another iftar...i still remember mardy's word.."the heart breaking of ppl telling u..." ok, maybe its kinda sensetive issue rite now..so, yah...juz hope dat the wak tongs can actually make it...n if anyone fears of it being overly X, dun wori, its gonna be lesser den 10 bucks, coz we orderin meal set..its more if u were to buy any other additional stuffs...insyaAllah lah...tak mahal...OK?~~me oso da kopak..hehehe..~~
i forgot to mention the other day, when i was at sakunthala's, i smsed my fellow siots to call me when azan, i didnt expect any of dem to actually kol me arh..ahahaa!!!coz, i was imagining, nat to be working, zahra not at home, n mera slping..hahaha..but den, Nat called, den 5 mins later, zahra kol...den abt an hour later, mahera smsed...i was touched arh...coz i really really don xpect anyone to kol bck or wateva...hmmm...my fellow siots, are the peeps i can trust most...i said most eh, i didnt say the only ppl i can trust, dere is a diff...
p/s: to annonymous, (dat can be found on the tag), who eva u are kan, wateva is written here, is juz my tots of the situation, if u cant accept it, den, dun read...exagerration or not, i do things full heartedly..n imagine if it was u, u'll be dissapointed too...espeacially when it comes frm ppl dat oredi promised, n u trusted.....


she told the story ... 11:42 AM


Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Whoohhooo!!
Yesterday was funny...was hanging arnd wif the whole family...weirdlah..but kinda orites...
Arnd 11, went out wif mama for a while, coz planned to go to Ainuls coz of the baju...but since i donno her home number, n i think she's at sch, deres no way i cud contact her..so me n mama, went lot 1 for dry cleaning service for the curtain, den mama went to press money...while waiting for the bus, which was super duper late, i said to mama, lets go seiyu to but..ehems.. den we went off. we were browsing arnd...found nothing nice to but, or nothing interesting...till i saw dis shirt. i was complating on buy it...coz, its very minah...really...if i were to wear dat going out, ppl really luk at me as a minah...but i really like it...its purple stripes...n has de huge "minah's" buttons...haiz...it was 23.90....kinda worth it...wat made me bought it was...the tot of me actually minding abt wat ppl gonna judge me. i mean, since when did i eva care? huh? i wear wat i want.. if it minah, or wateva, its not gonna change who i am...so, i bought it, becoz i like it...n yah.. wateva..hahaha!!!
after dat, we went home, n mama n abg start cleaning...i was like...? wat duh? after zohor, i sleep...while mama n abg were still in the midst of cleaning...when i woke up, i found new chairs in my living room!!! whohooo!!! but, the chairs are really really U-G-L-Y!!! hahaha...so doesnt match wif my house, but come to think of it, nothing else does..hahaha...
arnd 5 plus...mama n papa left first to sakunthala's where we breaking our fast..me n abg left later coz we took the bike..hehehe...when i arrived dere, i really had a culture shock..i felt as though i was in bombay!!! LOL!!! all arnd me are indians..either hindus...or i donno wat..in the menu, dere were no beef...ARRGHHH!!! den, i qsned, "is did place halal?" so i luked arnd n papa said, "halal lah..to aper cert dier" my faced was juz cramed...even mama noticed it...n dey kept on asking, "kau apersal moi?" apersal? apersal??? yesterday, i was in a fine dinning restraunt, n today i was in...BOMBAY??!! hahaha...!!!! but the food was, oklah..abit masin..abg, really had good time....he was licking his plate!!! juz kiddin...hahaha...den, after dat, papa left for work, abg left to fetch his girl, me n mama took a cab home...n my face was still cramped...!! mama kept asing me in the cab...i was thnking....issit so obvious? den i saw the reflection of me...den i realised...yah..it is bloody obvious...LOL!!
hahaha....so today, maybe going iftar wif Mardy, Nat, Rui n Jay....donno if i shud go...i am missing Mardy...n nat!!! nvr tot i mite say dis, but i actually miss Nat!!!! no, not bcoz of anything, juz dat, i oways mit her...dat, my brain like kinda hv dis conlusion dat i wont get the chance to miss her...yeah..i miss you Nat-tto!!! so..maybe..i go....


she told the story ... 11:46 AM


Monday, October 02, 2006

So, wat hppnd yesterday? instead of Fab4 n me, it turned out to be juz Jay n Me...HAIZ....
I was really fed-up arh...its a fact..i was really really ****** up with Hazzy, fatimah n mera even arh...cant blame me..cant blame dem..but at dat moment, i juz felt as though dey were taking pleasure in making my horriblely miserable day juz even worser...*****..its a damn long story arh..to cut it short, angsty still left with 3% arh...but, the upset eh...i donno when can i forget... but, im not really mad at mahera arh...atleast, she tried to make it up arh...i dun care arh...n lesson learn frm yesterday, some ppl, r really not worth it arh....n i've let it go arh...to me, now, dere's omost no meaning in freindship...haiz...n i am so not looking forward for any other iftar..wif ppl dat juz gonna be bubble..haizz....so, laz nite, was only me n Jay...n we had fun...
n i told Jay "the story" ( if u're wondering wats the story abt, dont, it doesnt matter). N, Jay was ultimately suprised, not pleasently arh....her face was like, wondering why i gotten mysef assosiated wif those kind of ppl...n like half way of the story, her expression was like, "i cant take it anymore!!" but, she kinndly juz listened arh...haiz..i noe..its weird how i got assosiated wif those dat ppl hv been calling "sampah masyarakat"...haizz...den, i dreamt of him at night... juz when i tot he has dissappear....wats the dream abt? doesnt really matter...
Weird thing : while chatting wif Jay, lexander saw me, den he actually like knock on the glass n said hi...He is very cute sia...really...very frenly...haizzz....
p/s: this is an anger post, if u feel offended, im sorry...but, i was offended too...
pp/s: no more iftar for me...at least, not for now...


she told the story ... 1:45 PM


Sunday, October 01, 2006

Juz finished watching Hady Mirza on suria segar...God, he has lost weight!!! he's tembam is half gone...pity him...ARGGGHHHH!!!! i love Hady!!!!
While watching the show, i remind mysef of Tamaki frm ouran high...tamaki oways hv this fantasy wif haruhi dat he will like bcome wobble n jelly like, HAHAHAH, dats wat i become when i saw hady...omg..its been a while since i last saw him!!!!
You noe, he went to the stage n said, "Assalamualaikum"!!!! SUPER CUTE!!! BUT, the even cuter thing is, he salam din, khai but NOT nurul!!!! LOL!!!! den, nurul was the one yg hulurkan tgn..den he slm her...Hady..hady..nk step maner nyer baik jeeerrr....HAHAHHA....
Den, i remember smthg...abt kate n Tom cruise....do u noe dat kate grew up dreaming of marrying tom cruise??!!! ok~~u may say so tkder kene mengener....BUT, to me, ADER!!! well, who noes, now, i growing up dreaming of marrying Hady..who noes...maybe smday i will..!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH~~~~~oklah..enuf abt Hady....
moving onto today's event...which is, Iftar wif Fab 4....@.... donno where yet...haiz...i donno if jay hv decide opn where, im scared if she tot dat i'll be thinking abt it...haiz....i wanna iftar @ where Hady is..can?? hahhaha...2morro...no plans...haiz...when will i get my irsyad pay?? no, a better qsn, WHEN WILL I MARRY HADY???!!!!!!





<----Hady's expression if he eva see me--->
HAZUKASHI!!!! >.<


she told the story ... 11:07 AM


that's me


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